Tonight I went to Walgreens to purchase some milk and chocolates. I stepped up to the register to be greeted by a rather jolly young man. I'm not the real friendly type so I just said a simple hi as he rang up my items.
As I was fiddling with my credit card, I got the feeling he was staring at me as he bagged my chocolates. It kind of creeped me out and I didn't dare look up for fear of making eye contact and having to start some awkward small talk. So I fiddled with my credit card until he was done bagging my items at which point I figured I could grab the bag and leave without more than a "have a nice night."
I was sadly mistaken. As I grabbed my bag and was about to leave, he spoke. The conversation went something like this (Note: I was wearing a fluffy pink scarf from Gap):
Walgreens guy: Is that scarf all wool, or a mix?
Me: ... ... Uh ... I'm not really sure. It's probably a mix.
Walgreens guy: Yeah, I bet it's like 90% wool and 10% cotton. Then you get the warmth without the irritation.
Me: Yeah, it's not too itchy. (Trying desperately to walk away)
Walgreens Guy: Yeah, then it's probably not all wool.
Me: Yeah.
Then I left.
P.S. This is not Walgreens related, but my roommate walked in while I was writing this and said, "I was a little worried about you, there were some huge footprints going up the stairs with manly looking shoe prints. I thought maybe someone broke in!" Nope, those were my huge feet and manly shoe prints. Thanks.
2 comments:
this is an amazing conversation. reminds me of the time i was walking down the street and a stranger asked me if i had fingernail clippers...without so much as a hello first!
Just thinking (with my twisted mind) about how "he bagged your chocolates" is the best non-euphemism euphemism EVER. I mean, how can that not sounds little sketchy? You crack me up.
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