This afternoon I was poking around in my Google Analytics (where I can spy on what people are searching for to get to my blogs) and came across a very interesting search term: "benji the hunted traumatized." This immediately excited me because I have seriously been holding on to this Benji the Hunted thing for like 20 years. I'm so glad to know that there's someone else out there who was traumatized by this devil of a movie!
What happened was one day, when I was approximately 4 years old, my mother thought it would be a great idea to take me to a movie about animals dying. I'm not sure that she knew there would be so much bloodshed, but there was. All at the beginning. So we had to leave like 5 minutes after it started. I truly was traumatized.
This horrific event has never left me. To this day my mother makes fun of me for it and on occasion will threaten to force me to watch this terrible, painful, disgusting movie. I've never hated a movie so much. Obviously.
Anyway, now that I've realized that there are others out there who were also traumatized, and have also not gotten over it seeing as they're just now doing a Google search for it, I figured I'd make a post about it. Hopefully other traumatized people will find this post and we can discuss our experiences. Kind of like a Benji the Hunted support group.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
St. Patrick's Day
I had a lovely St. Patrick's Day, as usual.
It started out with a very fun day in Chicago on Saturday to see the green river and the parade. I'd never actually gone to check out the river which is unfortunate, because it really is quite cool! Even with the huge mass of people, we managed to get a good spot and spent some time taking pictures.
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The parade was good, but not quite as easy to see. We finally sneaked around to a decent spot except it wasn't exactly legal and the cops on horses kept yelling at us. But we persisted and ended up getting to see quite a bit. Then we almost got killed by some unruley horses and a giant Leprechaun balloon/float that almost fell on us.
On Sunday we enjoyed a traditional Irish dinner with some of the family. I don't have any pictures of the actual food, but I do have pictures of some cute kids:
On Tuesday, I celebrated the day by wearing some green (and my awesome big green ring) and getting a free Shamrock Shake at McDonald's with my coworkers. Except I got chocolate because, let's be honest, the Shamrock ones are kind of disgusting. Later in the evening I celebrated with the bf (Scott) by watching the St. Patrick's Day episode of The Simpsons and drinking Green River. Pretty much perfect.
It started out with a very fun day in Chicago on Saturday to see the green river and the parade. I'd never actually gone to check out the river which is unfortunate, because it really is quite cool! Even with the huge mass of people, we managed to get a good spot and spent some time taking pictures.
.jpg)
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The parade was good, but not quite as easy to see. We finally sneaked around to a decent spot except it wasn't exactly legal and the cops on horses kept yelling at us. But we persisted and ended up getting to see quite a bit. Then we almost got killed by some unruley horses and a giant Leprechaun balloon/float that almost fell on us.
On Sunday we enjoyed a traditional Irish dinner with some of the family. I don't have any pictures of the actual food, but I do have pictures of some cute kids:
On Tuesday, I celebrated the day by wearing some green (and my awesome big green ring) and getting a free Shamrock Shake at McDonald's with my coworkers. Except I got chocolate because, let's be honest, the Shamrock ones are kind of disgusting. Later in the evening I celebrated with the bf (Scott) by watching the St. Patrick's Day episode of The Simpsons and drinking Green River. Pretty much perfect.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Root Beer Barrels vs. Blender
Last week through a series of emails involving my love for root beer floats and cookies, Scott (the bf) and I were basically challenged to create root beer float cookies for a get together with some friends on Saturday. Of course, we couldn't pass that up so we found a recipe online for them. I was a little surprised that a root beer float cookie recipe actually existed, but I shouldn't have been; everything exists on the internet.
Anyway, the recipe we found called for crushed up root beer barrels to be mixed into the dough so I ran to Walgreens and got like a 2 pound bag. We first tried to crush them up in a ziploc bag but it turns out that when they break up they become extremely sharp and the bag broke in 2 seconds.
Our next option was the old stand-by: the blender. Scott threw a few barrels into the blender and it seemed to work rather well. We were getting them down to a powder, so we went with it. After a few minutes, however, disaster struck when the root beer barrels blew a hole straight through the blender. Not a crack, not a ding; a full on hole. I had no idea these things could be so destructive. They're practically a weapon!
Luckily, God provided when we visited an estate sale the next day and found a mixer from the 1970's that included a heavy duty glass blender attachment. I don't think we'll have any problems with that one. Hopefully.
Anyway, the recipe we found called for crushed up root beer barrels to be mixed into the dough so I ran to Walgreens and got like a 2 pound bag. We first tried to crush them up in a ziploc bag but it turns out that when they break up they become extremely sharp and the bag broke in 2 seconds.
Our next option was the old stand-by: the blender. Scott threw a few barrels into the blender and it seemed to work rather well. We were getting them down to a powder, so we went with it. After a few minutes, however, disaster struck when the root beer barrels blew a hole straight through the blender. Not a crack, not a ding; a full on hole. I had no idea these things could be so destructive. They're practically a weapon!
Luckily, God provided when we visited an estate sale the next day and found a mixer from the 1970's that included a heavy duty glass blender attachment. I don't think we'll have any problems with that one. Hopefully.
Monday, February 23, 2009
He Is Just That Into You
Warning: I'll probably give away the ending to this movie (He's Just Not That Into You) in some way, so if you're really dying to see it then don't read this! But it turned out rather predictable and you'll probably figure out what's going to happen about 15 minutes in anyway.
Last year sometime my mother gave me the book, He's Just Not That Into You. I'm not sure what she was implying there, but I read it anyway and quite enjoyed it. Granted, much of what they talk about in the book doesn't relate to my and my squeaky-cleanness, (He's just not that into you if he's not sleeping with you?? I'm in trouble.) but it made an overall good point: if a guy likes you, he'll pursue you. I'd seen countless girlfriends obsess (I never have, of course) over whether or not a boy liked them, only to find out he just wanted to be friends, so I appreciated the bluntness of the book.
I was hoping the film would be as straightforward and honest as the book, but let's face it, that's just not the Hollywood way!
Anyway, I went to see it with some friends last weekend and it was basically a huge disappointment. Actually, the first half seemed to hold some promise. Good points were made, and sections were introduced with a line from the book (He's just not that into you if he's not calling you, and so on ...). But then, halfway through, things took a turn for the worse.
It followed a few different characters and their stories (which I did really enjoy), the main one being about unlucky-in-love Gigi, who befriends a fellow named Alex who sees what a dating mess she is and begins to give her advice, almost straight from the book. It was good advice, I thought, and it seemed to give her a much healthier dating life. But by the end of the film, just about everything he said went out the window and the movie itself reverted back to the kind of chick-flick that gives women the very same crazy ideas that the book has tried so hard to dispel. The title itself is generally misleading as pretty much every guy in the movie is into exactly who you're expecting him to be into. Except, ironically, the married man who was not into his wife. By the end it was just so confusing that we all ended up leaving the theater depressed.
Anyway, here are the top things I learned from watching He's Just Not That Into You:
- If you're with a guy who won't marry you, it's not that he's not into you, it's that he's not going to propose until you tell him you don't want to get married. That's the secret.
- If you do get your husband to marry you (against his will?) he'll cheat on you with a skanky girl from the grocery store, so don't push it!
- Women shouldn't care so much about getting married, gosh!
- There's no such thing as a good relationship without some good drama!
- If you think a guy may be acting like he likes you, you should come on to him. If he says he just wants to be friends, you should tell him that actually he wants to be more than friends, he just doesn't know it yet. Then date other guys until the first guy realizes he is into you and finally asks you out. Then live happily ever after.
- There's actually no way to know if a guy is into you, so stop trying!
Last year sometime my mother gave me the book, He's Just Not That Into You. I'm not sure what she was implying there, but I read it anyway and quite enjoyed it. Granted, much of what they talk about in the book doesn't relate to my and my squeaky-cleanness, (He's just not that into you if he's not sleeping with you?? I'm in trouble.) but it made an overall good point: if a guy likes you, he'll pursue you. I'd seen countless girlfriends obsess (I never have, of course) over whether or not a boy liked them, only to find out he just wanted to be friends, so I appreciated the bluntness of the book.
I was hoping the film would be as straightforward and honest as the book, but let's face it, that's just not the Hollywood way!
Anyway, I went to see it with some friends last weekend and it was basically a huge disappointment. Actually, the first half seemed to hold some promise. Good points were made, and sections were introduced with a line from the book (He's just not that into you if he's not calling you, and so on ...). But then, halfway through, things took a turn for the worse.
It followed a few different characters and their stories (which I did really enjoy), the main one being about unlucky-in-love Gigi, who befriends a fellow named Alex who sees what a dating mess she is and begins to give her advice, almost straight from the book. It was good advice, I thought, and it seemed to give her a much healthier dating life. But by the end of the film, just about everything he said went out the window and the movie itself reverted back to the kind of chick-flick that gives women the very same crazy ideas that the book has tried so hard to dispel. The title itself is generally misleading as pretty much every guy in the movie is into exactly who you're expecting him to be into. Except, ironically, the married man who was not into his wife. By the end it was just so confusing that we all ended up leaving the theater depressed.
Anyway, here are the top things I learned from watching He's Just Not That Into You:
- If you're with a guy who won't marry you, it's not that he's not into you, it's that he's not going to propose until you tell him you don't want to get married. That's the secret.
- If you do get your husband to marry you (against his will?) he'll cheat on you with a skanky girl from the grocery store, so don't push it!
- Women shouldn't care so much about getting married, gosh!
- There's no such thing as a good relationship without some good drama!
- If you think a guy may be acting like he likes you, you should come on to him. If he says he just wants to be friends, you should tell him that actually he wants to be more than friends, he just doesn't know it yet. Then date other guys until the first guy realizes he is into you and finally asks you out. Then live happily ever after.
- There's actually no way to know if a guy is into you, so stop trying!
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Tuesday Morning, 7 a.m.
That's right, I got up at the crack of dawn on Tuesday to take advantage of a free Grand Slam at Denny's. Actually, dawn hadn't even cracked when I woke up, which was disappointing. Anyway, I ventured out to meet a couple coworkers, Emily and Todd, at the Denny's by work. There was actually a line out the door. It was weird. Also it was like 10 degrees. Is this really what we've come to? Waiting in 10 degree weather for a free mediocre breakfast? Desperate times call for desperate measures!
Anyway, after about 20 cold minutes we finally got seated and all was well with the world. Seeing as it was highly unlikely that I would ever see a line out the door at Denny's again in my life, I took a picture:
I was so excited about this Denny's adventure that the night before I had a dream about it, except in the dream, this trip to Denny's included the entire company walking across the street to the Denny's and then gathering for a pre-Denny's meeting which I skipped out on in order to beat the rush to the Denny's.
I kind of want some Denny's now.
Anyway, after about 20 cold minutes we finally got seated and all was well with the world. Seeing as it was highly unlikely that I would ever see a line out the door at Denny's again in my life, I took a picture:
I was so excited about this Denny's adventure that the night before I had a dream about it, except in the dream, this trip to Denny's included the entire company walking across the street to the Denny's and then gathering for a pre-Denny's meeting which I skipped out on in order to beat the rush to the Denny's.
I kind of want some Denny's now.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Evil Sigourney Weaver
I've been having (and remembering) some really weird dreams lately, so I thought I'd share. This one's from a couple week's ago.
I was going going to be in a movie with I think Sigourney Weaver. (This was weird because a few weeks before I'd had dream where I was in a movie with Sigourney Weaver and I was sharing the Gospel with her. It's not like I watch a lot of Sigourney Weaver movies, so I don't know where that's coming from!) So I was in this room with Sigourney and we were discussing the movie and it turned out that she was pure evil and she would just randomly kill whoever she wanted to. She was very dangerous. So she told me that she wanted me to kill 2 other people who were in the movie with us ... one older man, possibly the guy from The West Wing, and a younger girl, possibly Claire Danes. I was afraid she was going to kill me if I didn't kill them so I killed them. But all I had to do to kill them was cut photos of them in half. Then I started freaking out realizing that I just killed two people, and I felt so guilty and I was worried I was going to get caught.
So the rest of the dream was me freaking out and trying to figure out what to do. I prayed about it and I felt very convicted that I should just confess, but then I knew I'd be in jail forever. I also kept debating if I should tell my boyfriend or my mother. I kept imagining being in the court room and trying to figure out what I could say to get out of it. I kept telling myself that the right thing to do was to just confess but I really didn't want to do that because then I knew that I'd pretty much never get married or have kids or anything and that upset me. But I knew I'd feel terrible for the rest of my life if I didn't confess. I also thought that by confessing, I'd be getting Sigourney in trouble since she was behind it all. But I still knew that I'd go to jail for a long time. So I debated with myself forever and then I woke up. I've never been so happy to wake up from a dream! I think I can say that I now have an idea of what it would feel like to kill someone. I don't recommend it.
I was going going to be in a movie with I think Sigourney Weaver. (This was weird because a few weeks before I'd had dream where I was in a movie with Sigourney Weaver and I was sharing the Gospel with her. It's not like I watch a lot of Sigourney Weaver movies, so I don't know where that's coming from!) So I was in this room with Sigourney and we were discussing the movie and it turned out that she was pure evil and she would just randomly kill whoever she wanted to. She was very dangerous. So she told me that she wanted me to kill 2 other people who were in the movie with us ... one older man, possibly the guy from The West Wing, and a younger girl, possibly Claire Danes. I was afraid she was going to kill me if I didn't kill them so I killed them. But all I had to do to kill them was cut photos of them in half. Then I started freaking out realizing that I just killed two people, and I felt so guilty and I was worried I was going to get caught.
So the rest of the dream was me freaking out and trying to figure out what to do. I prayed about it and I felt very convicted that I should just confess, but then I knew I'd be in jail forever. I also kept debating if I should tell my boyfriend or my mother. I kept imagining being in the court room and trying to figure out what I could say to get out of it. I kept telling myself that the right thing to do was to just confess but I really didn't want to do that because then I knew that I'd pretty much never get married or have kids or anything and that upset me. But I knew I'd feel terrible for the rest of my life if I didn't confess. I also thought that by confessing, I'd be getting Sigourney in trouble since she was behind it all. But I still knew that I'd go to jail for a long time. So I debated with myself forever and then I woke up. I've never been so happy to wake up from a dream! I think I can say that I now have an idea of what it would feel like to kill someone. I don't recommend it.
Monday, December 29, 2008
Top Ten Stories of 2008
This time of year everyone does their big lists of the top books/movies/cocktails/evil clown stories of the year, so I figured I'd get in on it. My place of employment (Christianity Today) recently published their Top Ten Stories of 2008 so I thought I'd complement that with my own top ten stories of the year, taken directly from this blog. Also, I didn't feel like writing an actual blog post.
10. In the Ghettoooo. I've written quite a bit out the crazy people that live below us, but in April I decided to take pictures of their mess to prove that, as suspected, we are the Naperville ghetto.
9. Stevie at the Taste. I got to see Stevie Wonder at the Taste of Chicago and it was amazing!! I couldn't see much of the stage, but it was still great. I even got some video.
8. Sheer Silence. After being forced to make awkward small talk with my hair stylist, I unveiled my brilliant business model for a anti-small talk salon.
7. McDonald's Miracle. God uses McDonald's to provide me with the perfect camera bag. Truly a miracle!
6. Kim vs. McDonald's. Another McDonald's story, is that bad? I'm not obsessed. Anyway, after I called McDonald's out last year on their poor choices regarding Happy Meal toys, they conceded this year and gave me exactly what I asked for.
5. Walgreens Weirdness. Last January I encountered a very strange young man at the Walgreens who was disturbingly interested in my scarf. Needless to say, I haven't been back to that Walgreens in some time.
4. Monitor Controversy. While waiting for my new monitor at work, I find that the empty cube next to me got one before I did. Fortunately, I have my monitor now, but I haven't forgotten this incident!!
3. New York, New York. I went to NY and took too many photos. It was amazing!!
2. BAT! 2 a.m., bats, toilets; the makings of a perfect story. I relive this story every time I enter my bathroom. But despite the fact that it was called the "best post ever" by some (Marc), it came in a close second to ...
1. Saturday Surprise. My wonderful boyfriend treated me to a fun surprise for our 6 month anniversary involving chocolate, manicures, Santa, and Chuck-E-Cheese. A pretty perfect day!
10. In the Ghettoooo. I've written quite a bit out the crazy people that live below us, but in April I decided to take pictures of their mess to prove that, as suspected, we are the Naperville ghetto.
9. Stevie at the Taste. I got to see Stevie Wonder at the Taste of Chicago and it was amazing!! I couldn't see much of the stage, but it was still great. I even got some video.
8. Sheer Silence. After being forced to make awkward small talk with my hair stylist, I unveiled my brilliant business model for a anti-small talk salon.
7. McDonald's Miracle. God uses McDonald's to provide me with the perfect camera bag. Truly a miracle!
6. Kim vs. McDonald's. Another McDonald's story, is that bad? I'm not obsessed. Anyway, after I called McDonald's out last year on their poor choices regarding Happy Meal toys, they conceded this year and gave me exactly what I asked for.
5. Walgreens Weirdness. Last January I encountered a very strange young man at the Walgreens who was disturbingly interested in my scarf. Needless to say, I haven't been back to that Walgreens in some time.
4. Monitor Controversy. While waiting for my new monitor at work, I find that the empty cube next to me got one before I did. Fortunately, I have my monitor now, but I haven't forgotten this incident!!
3. New York, New York. I went to NY and took too many photos. It was amazing!!
2. BAT! 2 a.m., bats, toilets; the makings of a perfect story. I relive this story every time I enter my bathroom. But despite the fact that it was called the "best post ever" by some (Marc), it came in a close second to ...
1. Saturday Surprise. My wonderful boyfriend treated me to a fun surprise for our 6 month anniversary involving chocolate, manicures, Santa, and Chuck-E-Cheese. A pretty perfect day!
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